Lately I have been thinking a lot about the world and the many issues we face urgently - climate, economy, human rights...and what a mess we are leaving for our children. And then of course I question if it is justifiable to make your living making music - and is it trivial? When all is said and done, music is what remains, music is one of those things that makes us more human. Music does something to you - it makes you smarter, it teaches you to be more humane, to understand others better. It is a way to connect through barriers, and to console. And it is important to tell that to the world, and to teach that to the kids. So no, I don't think it is trivial, I think it is important.
I have been blessed with so much goodwill - a person of incredible grace and love has come forward, to help me get my new cello. This just takes my breath away on so many levels, and in a way helps me remember that while there is incredible evil in the world, there is also incredible kindness.
Soon, I will have the cello. This fills me with equal measures of delight and trepidation...I have had my current instrument for 25 years: it has been my companion, my wingman, my voice through so much. Playing it feels like home. I have always had a terrible time leaving, and this really feels kind of like leaving home for the first time, for good. What if my voice IS my cello, what if I can't truly find it on another instrument, what if it won't feel so natural that playing is like breathing? At the same time, I am confident that the new cello is worth it - the decision to try to buy it was really made with head as much as heart, with time, and and I am excited about the prospect of finding the new dimensions - my new voice, the colors and having an inclination of the possibilities that are there. The future. One that I am lucky to have!